I Hate You, Just Wanna Get That Out There
by Distopian Heart
Summary: Hey! This is my second story, and the only one I've done that isn't in first person. Rated M for later chapters, don't hate me! Okay, actual summary: Dib is hopelessly in love with a certain green alien. What lengths will he go for love?
1. I Shall Rule You!

**Hahaha! To think that I would ever write this kind of story! While listening to a playlist based around sex. o.O Well, those who've read my other story know that I know how to write this shit…**

**So! Happy Saturday, or whatever day you're reading this!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim, because if I did, then I wouldn't have to write this. There would be much more of this in the show!**

**Warning: Slash. Guy on guy. ZimxDib. ZaDr. Please acknowledge!**

Damn filth human!

Always foiling Zim's plots, attempting to convince the others, and just being an all around monkey! You'd think, after all these years, he'd give up! Even a little bit! But, _no,_ he just _has_ to be stubborn!

Humans disgusted Zim in general. But Dib was a special case. He made Zim sick to his squidley spooch. Or something that involved his lower abdomen. Whenever Zim saw him, he always got a weird feeling there.

Zim wished he knew what it was.

"Gir. Stop with the muffins already."

The small robot, who was in his disguise even though they were in the base, looked up at Zim at the order. He was holding a large muffin pan, about to throw the pastries into the huge pile that had already formed. "But they're muffins!"

"Exactly." Zim said, standing near the door. "I already heaved this morning because of them. I do not need to have more previously digested food come out of my mouth."

"Where you going, Master?" Gir asked innocently, noticing a gloved hand resting on the door handle.

"No idea." Zim replied. "I'm just hoping that the fresh air will help me devise a new plan."

"Tell the big headed boy I said HAI!" The robot cried.

Zim shook his head as his walked out. He would have asked what Gir had meant by that, but the truth was, the green-skinned teen had been bumping into Dib a lot more lately. It was usually in Zim's house, too, because Dib was trying out some secret ops phase.

So maybe he would tell the little bitch that Gir said 'hai'.

Just to screw with his mind.

Heh. He was thinking like a human. How…_filthy_.

He let my thoughts wander as his legs carried him wherever they wanted him to go. World domination, human food, home…

Home.

How he missed Irk. But that was a story to be told later on.

Dib watched the five different scenes on his computer screen. They were all taken from separate cameras in Zim's house to get the different angles in his life. The human switched to the next five as Zim left his house.

Now, Dib knows what you're wondering.

Dib, you're a healthy young man, why don't you go out in the world and get yourself a girlfriend and stop obsessing over the green kid?

Well, one, because he was gay. Second of all, he _was_ obsessed with Zim. Ever since he had laid his eyes on him. It wasn't healthy, he'll tell ya. He played it off as hatred towards the alien for wanting to destroy the human race, and he tried to make people believe that Zim was a threat to society so that Dib could keep him in his lab for…_testing_.

_Oh, the things I could do to him…_

He shook his head. He was getting off on a tangent. Let's see where Zim was going today.

When his gaze focused back on the computer screen, he realized that Zim was standing outside Dib's house. He grinned. Well. This could _fun_.

Dib stood up and ran off to the front door. He put a scowl on his face as he opened the door. Walking out, he went up to the other boy. "Zim. What's up?"

Zim glowered at him. "I have no time for your infernal human interrogations. Stop wasting my life." He growled.

"Something tells me that you don't mean that." Dib said almost teasingly. "'Cause, let's face it, you're standing outside my house just staring. Do I have some connection to your big plan or something?" He smirked. "You know I don't play your games well, Zim."

Anger flooded Zim's eyes. "I shall initiate whatever games I shall, Dib-monkey!" He shouted.

Dib paused, staying calm. "Shut the fuck up." He said suddenly, purposely pissing Zim off. He was adorable when he was mad. His eyes (the real ones) would light up and sometimes even show through the lenses, he would clench his fists until veins could be seen pulsing, he would grit his teeth and form a perfect trapezoid with his triangular teeth…

Dib's provoking was successful.

"I SHALL RULE YOU!" Zim howled before speeding off back towards his house.

As soon as Dib was sure the alien was out of earshot, he laughed. He kept laughing as he went back inside his house. Zim was so fun to toy with.

"Dib. You're laughter annoys me. Shut up." Gaz grumbled as he walked past her.

The older of the siblings smiled at the other. "Shutting up." He replied, sprinting back to his lab/bedroom.

It was December. Snow and frost already dusted the ground, beautifying the world. The only thing that made it better?

As Dib focused on Zim on one of his hidden cameras in Zim's house as he ran down the street, just as a new snowstorm broke out in the world.

**FF**

"I. Hate. School." Zim growled to himself, hitting his forehead on my locker. _Just you wait, Earth,_ he thought harshly. _I will enslave you all to be my loyal servants._

"I see a plot in your eyes, Zim."

He turned around to face that damn paranormal-investigator-filth-bitch. "I hate you, just wanted to get that out there." The alien said bluntly.

"Frankly, I don't give a damn. The feeling's mutual." Dib said, smirking wickedly. "Shall I foil your plots once again?" He asked in that smartass tone of his.

Zim shrugged. "I'm tired. Thus, I don't have a plot for you to foil. Sorry to rain on your piteous parade."

Dib blinked, looking lost for a reply. It was turn for Zim to smirk.

"What? Squirrel got the filth-human's taste muscle?" He teased. Dib frowned, a flickering light above the two making his glasses shine, hiding his eyes.

"You fucked up that saying so much, it's not even funny." He said.

Zim rolled his eyes. "Whatever. I'm going to class. Fuck off." He retorted, turning away from the other teen.

_Don't you worry about that, Zim_, Dib thought lustily. _I will. Definitely._

**Okay. So…short chapter. Next chapter will be longer, I promise! xD So, you picking up what I'm putting down? Cocky!Dib in love, pissy!Zim is oblivious?**

**Well, anyway, it's pretty late at night. Shouldn't I be asleep right now? Ugh, someone help me. I feel like an insomniac. xD**

**Dib: Distopian Heart! Sleep! Now!**

**No.**

**Zim: *looks up* What are **_**you **_**doing up so late, Dib?**

**Yeah, Dibbles? What **_**are **_**you doing up so late?**

**Dib: Okay, first, Dibbles? The fuck? And second, I'm up really late because I just got a new CD and I wanted to listen to it.**

**Oh. Good reason, dude.**

**Zim: Meh. I've heard better.**

**Dib: What if I told you I stayed up so late because of you? Maybe you haunt my dreams so vividly that I can't stand to see you like that again unless it was for real.**

**Zim: …*crosses one leg over the other***

**Dib: *smirks***

**Well, before these two do unspeakable things to each other, I'll finish this bitch up. Alright, my minions! Rate, review, love!**


	2. Your End Is Imminent

…**This is very late after in my standards. But I felt like writing this because if I leave the room my mom will kill me. o.o Help me…**

**Anyway!**

**Sorry last chapter was so short. I just didn't know how to start it. But now that I have, it will be EPIC. And yes, I spell EPIC in all caps. Just like CHUCK NORRIS.**

**But that's just me.**

**xD So, how you guys liking it so far? Well, I guess that's what reviews are for. But blah.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim, because if I did, then I wouldn't have to write this. There would be much more of this in the show!**

**Warning: Slash. Guy on guy. ZimxDib. ZaDr. Please acknowledge!**

Dib found himself lying on the floor, panting. Puke was all around him, soaking into his clothes. His eyes were wide and his glasses were askew.

Damn ulcers. Dib was going to have to be more careful when he ate school lunches. He hauled himself to his feet, shaking the throw up off his clothes. When his father had first diagnosed him with ulcers, Dib had thought it was stress-related. At the time, his grades had been slipping just a bit, and, as a semi-genius in the modern age, he had found that shockingly disturbing. So, yeah, he had been stressed at the time. And now, he couldn't eat lemons.

Just lemons, too.

Oranges, limes, all other citrus fruits were fine. But lemons? Those bitches got him puking up his own digestive track.

He looked around and found that he was in the bathroom attached to his bedroom. He washed his face in the sink, then cleaned up the mess he had made on the floor. He undressed until he was just in his boxers, and walked out to his large bedroom, which could also be considered his lab.

It had the usual bedroom materials – a bed, a mirror on the door, a drawer to put all his clothes in, all that jazz. But the rest of his room was covered in his lab materials. The walls were lined with newspaper articles headlined with something along the lines of, 'ALIEN SIGHTINGS – REAL OR FAKE?' And his floor was littered with little gadgets that he had made to help him in his quest to reveal Zim for the alien he was.

Dib had actually become a modern-day genius over the years. It wasn't like he was Jimmy Neutron or Einstein, but he was the best hacker for miles and he had made contraptions and got grades that still had his teachers baffled.

Just as he was rifling through his drawer to find a tank top or something to wear, he caught a movement in the corner of his eye. As an act of habit, he grabbed the nearest gadget, which he couldn't exactly tell what it was immediately, due to its shape, and aimed it towards the window.

Nothing.

He glanced at his 'weapon' first, finding that it was a tranquilizer gun that he had made in the eighth grade, and cautiously drew closer to the window. I peered out the window to see…

Nothing. Again.

What the fuck?

Dib sighed, dropping the tranq gun and walking to his bed. He glanced at the clock. 2:49 am. He sighed, crawling back into his messy bed.

Next thing he knew, he was falling down the endless darkness that swallowed him whole popularly known as sleep.

Zim, however, was wide awake. He watched from his lab camera which was shooting from Gir's vision. He sighed, realizing that Dib's life at home was nearly as uneventful as his own. Though, it might have been the fact that it was in the middle of the night. Dib wasn't _that _meddling and insane.

The alien narrowed his eyes and summoned his robot back to the base. _The bastard must be planning something…_ He growled in his mind, baring his sharp teeth. _Shouldn't _he_ be the crazy and schizo comic relief?_

Zim sighed and cast a sidelong glance at Gir's gigantic pile of plastic piggies. Zim smirked at the memory of fucking up Dib's life with those piggies. He turned to his computer screen. "Computer," he called for the machine to wake up, "take me to the bedroom."

"You're sleeping, sir?" The computer asked in an almost sarcastic tone. Ever since it had been taken over by Gir, Computer had gained a bit of an attitude.

"Yes." Zim replied. "Now make quick work of this. Tomorrow will be important."

Oh, indeed. The next day was _very_ important…

**FF**

Dib scratched his head as he walked out into the kitchen. He drank milk from the carton without care and grabbed an apple for breakfast. He was still only in a tank top and a pair of black silk boxers.

"Dib! Get dressed, you pig! You're making me nauseous!" Gaz ordered.

"Grow a pair, bitch. I threw up last night." Dib retorted, watching the news, bored. He knew he would probably get killed for that statement, but he got pissed off whenever his ulcer acted up.

Suddenly, something was blocking Dib's view of the TV. He placed his apple down on the coffee table before him so as to remove the offending item.

It was a shirt.

Dib tilted his head in confusion. "Gaz? What is this?" He called, looking over to the stairs where his sister was sitting, playing her Game Slave.

"You tell me. Zim brought it by before you woke up." She yelled back.

Dib's face heated up. Did he leave it on his last 'adventure' to the alien's base? Thinking back to the event…

Yeah, he did.

Don't ask. It's a long, embarrassing, and stupidly demented story that Dib hates to remember.

But how did Zim know it was his? _It's not like many people go to his house anyway, but still. I don't go there _that_ often, do I? _Thinking about it…

Yeah, he did.

Dib frowned. Geez, he'd have to stay away for a while. Which would get in the way of finding out whatever the hell Zim was planning. And just seeing the beautiful alien in general.

You could say that both boys have 'blossomed' over the years. Dib was still tall and lean, and his hands still seemed like talons to him, but he had grown into his head (finally!). He didn't have a very different style, either. He still wore the trench coat and skinny jeans, but now he wore Converse and a black shirt covered in words that didn't really mean anything to Dib. Onto Zim. He had grown taller, but was still short compared to other children his age. His teeth had grown into sharpened points, his claws had become deadly, and his eyes had darkened into a shade of scarlet.

He took Dib's breath away.

"Fuck!" Dib groaned, kicking the wall. He heard a small, almost-chuckle as soft footsteps faded, showing that Gaz had left the room. He gripped the shirt in his hands and held it to his face. Dib smelled _him_, _his_ house, _his_ aura. Dib let a small smile slip onto his face.

Chemicals.

Yay.

What Dib didn't realize was the eyes trained on him and his every move. Those eyes, whose color resembled blood dripping from a torn carcass, belonged to none other than Zim, Irken invader.

Zim was crouched on a thick branch, blending in with his skin, and staring straight throughthe window to see the lovestruck teen. He cringed at the sight of Dib's big ass smile. Seriously, what was his problem? Shouldn't he be embarrassed? Well? SHOULDN'T HE?

Zim sighed. He was going insane. Maybe it had been the sleep. Irkens didn't sleep much, so even a little bit too much was unhealthy. Convenient, right? He back slightly back into the foliage as he saw a figure exit the large house, a female figure mostly hid by a dark umbrella. The human filth's younger sister. He smirked.

Now was his chance.

He looked back into Dib's house. The genius was gone. He snickered as he opened the window and snuck in. He closed the window, looking around the living room around him. It was comfortably decorated, but there was a suffused tension combined with an intense silence that was strangely disquieting.

And Zim _liked_ silence.

He wandered around blindly, not caring where he was going. As long as the plan went as he wanted it to, everything would be fine.

He would have all the time in the world.

He would have the world.

Suddenly, there was a loud, obnoxious music flooding from upstairs. Zim raised an eyebrow-ridge (since he didn't actually have an eyebrow to raise, just the ridge) as he heard thumping steps come down the stairs. He walked back to the main living room to see Dib dancing – literally _dancing_ – down the stairs, air-drumming to the beat.

Dib didn't notice Zim at first, and danced to the beat of his favorite song, Puppet by Thousand Foot Krutch. He was air-drumming to the rhythm, humming along to the lyrics, and dancing down the stairs.

_It's all around me,  
And I can't wish this away.  
You so amaze me,  
You took my monster away.  
It's all around me,  
And I can't wish this away.  
You so amaze me,  
You took my monster away.  
And away, and away, and away._

Then he turned towards the window and saw Zim standing there, a passive, evil look on his face. Dib gulped.

This couldn't be good.

Why was Zim there? How'd he get in the house? Where had he been hiding?

_HOLYFUCKIT'SZIM! INYOURFUCKINGHOUSE! FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK!_

Dib felt his mouth go dry. He'll reiterate:

This _could NOT _be good.

"Zim." He choked out. "Uh…what's up, man?" He asked.

Zim stepped closer to him, his eyes darkening, but he never said a word. This made Dib even more nervous.

"Zim?" He squeaked.

"I am going to end you."

Zim's simple words frightened Dib more than the other, obvious facts. Such as: the meaning behind the words, Zim's foreign almost-accent coming through stronger than ever before, the closeness between the two teens.

_Ya wanna make it outta sight?  
Somebody wanna get loud tonight?  
We can hit that, flip that, settle the score,  
'n' ain't nobody rock a crowd like this before.  
Ya wanna make it outta sight?  
Somebody wanna get live tonight?  
Like an earthquake, let it shake,  
Make the floor vibrate, Krutch y'all,  
Back to set the record straight._

Dib ran.

His bare feet pounded against the marble floor, his heart beat heavily in his chest, his hair was pulled back in the wind of his speed, his mind was reeling.

Suddenly, Zim was in front of him, his face still unreceptive. Dib shrieked in shock and fear, and skidded away from the alien, turning to his left.

_Get away, get away, get away!_

Love or not, this was Dib's life.

He liked being alive.

"Oh, silly Dib," Zim's voice whispered in his ear, "you can't escape. Your minutes are limited."

Dib jumped over obstacles, trying to get away from the voice, from Zim, from his fear. From his death. "No!" He screamed.

"Your end is imminent."

"Fuck you!" Dib screeched.

"You will end."

Suddenly, Dib was in searing pain. He felt claws dig into his back, pulling him down onto the floor. Zim was suddenly standing above him, his eyes dancing with blood lust, his face pulled into a wicked smirk.

"Zim, you don't wanna do this! You don't wanna become a murderer!" Dib tried to reason, squirming on the ground.

"Oh, but you don't know the plan, Dib." Zim said softly, kneeling down.

Green talons ripped into soft, human skin. Human screams of agony tore through morning air. Sadistic, murderous laughs weaved in with the squeals..

_If your gonna run, how fast ya gonna run?  
And if your gonna jump, how high you gonna jump?  
All you perpetrators be walkin' round frontin',  
What?, you fakers afraid to stand for somethin'?  
If you're gonna run, how fast ya gonna run?  
And if you're gonna jump, how high ya gonna jump?  
All the perpetrators be walkin' round frontin'.  
Why don't you stand up and break me off somethin'?_

The blood stained more than just the floor.

…**Whoops. Made this a big gory. ;) I **_**wonder**_** what could happen next…**

**Dib: *cowers in Zim's lap* I'm scared! Am I gonna die?**

**Zim: I'd never let that happen, love.**

**Dib: *smiles weakly***

**Aw! So adorable!**

**Dib & Zim: *glare at me***

**What? I have plans. Plus, it's only the second chapter.**

**Dib: Yeah, but that just shows that more dramatic shit is gonna go down.**

…**Fuck, you've got a point. HAVE YOU BEEN READING MY MIND?**

**Zim: No, that was me. *smirks***

**Uhm. Okay. Anyway! I love you all, dear readers! Each and every one of you! Rate, review, love!**


	3. Hormone Transducers Suck

**What up, world? Yeah, it's me, your favorite (hopefully) Invader Zim slash writer! …That was pretty specific. But, you gotta keep it specific to have a place in the world! Ha!**

**So…anyway…OOH! PRETZELS!**

**xD Sorry. There was pretzels and hummus and now I'm eating them. Together. I think there's some Doritos in the cabinet…**

**No. I need to cut down on calories. **** Anyway, hope you like this chapter. I'm kinda improvising it…**

**Don't hate me!**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Invader Zim, because if I did, then I wouldn't have to write this. There would be much more of this in the show!**

**Warning: Slash. Guy on guy. ZimxDib. ZaDr. Please acknowledge!**

Amber eyes snapped open, a pale chest heaving.

Said eyes rolled around in their sockets, trying to figure out where the owner of them was. Those eyes were the only sensible part of that body at the moment, knowing that they had to absorb everything, lest they wanted the body to be lost or to die. Slowly, very slowly, the body's brain woke up itself and sent signals to all the different parts of the body. Pain suddenly radiated from the dorsal side and abdominals, making the lungs contract and the body gasp.

"Ah. You're finally awake."

Dib's gaze flicked over to his left, where he saw his beloved alien. Zim, who looked completely and utterly at peace, smirked at the human.

"Calm yourself. The more you panic, the more you hurt yourself."

His voice seemed warped somehow. It wasn't until Zim spoke again that Dib realized that it was that alien accent slipping in again. A part of Dib's mind couldn't help but feel just a bit turned on by the accent, even at the worst time possible.

Dib gulped. "I'll need information, you realize." He said, his voice breaking and trembling almost as violently as his body was. Zim nodded. Dib took another shuddering breath before continuing. "How badly am I hurt?"

"Almost not at all." Zim replied without skipping a beat. "The scratches I caused will heal without scarring, and other than that, you're fine."

Dib nodded to himself. "Why'd you hurt me?" He asked, noting that his voice was almost childlike.

Zim chuckled. "If I answered that question, it would mean revealing my plan, which I won't do until all of your little questions have been asked and answered."

Dib knew he wasn't getting any information out on that subject, so moved on. "Where am I?"

"My base." Zim countered. "My house. You've been here before, just not in this room."

"Oh. That makes sense." Dib panted. He looked around and noticed that, along with the fact that his glasses were on his face (thankfully), he was chained to a metal table, and heard a song he recognized as Schizophrenia by Brokencyde. Good song. "Why am I tied to a table?"

"All in good time, Dib." Zim almost hissed, stalking over.

"Z-Zim…" Dib whimpered, scared of getting hurt again. Zim smirked, his sadistic mind reeling in excitement.

"I infiltrated your brain and body systems." Dib panicked at the thought of Zim's hands roaming everywhere on his poor, wounded body. "I've learned a bit about you. Physically and mentally."

"L-l-like what?" Dib stuttered.

"Like the music you prefer. The…uh…fuck, what's it called?..." Zim thought for a second, then lit up. "Screamo music! That's what it's called! Yes, that is very enjoyable." The alien nodded. "Anyway, what I really needed to know was the way the way human babies' bodies and minds work."

"What do you mean?" Dib asked.

"_I mean_, I can figure out how humans' skin stay such a sickly color, and modify my hologram or my actual skin tone to match that of a human's. That way, I can fit in with the world, become a member of society, learn the ins and outs of what the people want. Later on in life, I can run for president. Run the world from its leading summit. Can you imagine it, Dib? Take over the world, one country at a time. Weave my way into the minds of every man, woman, and child and watch as the world implodes in on itself. It'll be glorious." Zim's eyes were glimmering with the mental images flooding his mind.

Dib gasped. "You wouldn't!"

"I would." Zim said simply. "And I will. But, in the meantime, I think I'll entertain myself with you."

The human raised an eyebrow. "What?" He asked. He barely had time to think before an uncontrollable wave of sheer fury surged through him. "GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE!" He shouted, unable to keep his pure, unadulterated rage inside.

Zim chuckled. "See, that's what I've learned about the human mind." He hissed, leaning in closer to Dib. "Your emotions are so easy to change. One twitch of the emotional finger…" Dib saw his hand rise up in the air, revealing that he was holding a remote of some sort. Zim pressed a button, and a new emotion welled up in him. Fear.

Unconditioned, utter fear. It made Dib tremble and whimper in sheer terror that Zim would hurt him or worse.

"…And you humans just change. Almost like a roller coaster. But multidirectional." Zim finished, his eyes trailing down the length of his captive's body. Dib pulled at his chains feebly, trying to pull himself from Zim's gaze. It was as if even his gaze would send him to his grave. Zim smirked so wide that his sharp teeth gleamed in the bright light of the lab's florescent lights. "Wanna see another way your head can spin?"

Dib shook his head, panic rising in his throat.

Zim stared in his eyes for a bit, then smirked wider. "Too bad." His finger twitched and Dib immediately felt a new sensation running through him, the terror draining from his veins. The new emotion was sadness.

He sudden felt a sudden depression, a certain knowledge that he'd never get out of this without harm. He'd be lucky just to get out of it alive at all. But he'd never had luck. Especially not with Zim.

What made this time so special?

Tears welled up in his eyes. He didn't even try to stop them. His misery was unstoppable. Why even try anything anymore?

He heard Zim chuckle. "See? You're so weak. My little toy." The alien hissed.

Dib choked out a sob in reply.

"Oh, Dib…" Zim sighed, turning towards his desk. "Computer! Play with Gir." He ordered, walking off to do something. Dib kept floating down into his sadness, submitting to his ties to the table. He only vaguely noticed the lights turning dimmer, and a song he hazily remembered… I'm Not Your Boyfriend Baby by 3OH!3…

Suddenly, he wasn't sad anymore.

"Feeling the new change?"

He squirmed, squeezing his eyes shut. _Stupid…fucking… _He started panting, knowing that no amount of wiggling would do anything at that point.

Zim smirked. "You seem to be. Good. This was actually the easiest change to make. You see, your little crush on me can certainly be used to my advantage."

At this point, Dib couldn't think straight. The feelings pouring up inside of him were too much for him.

"Yes…definitely advantageous…"

Zim's eyes traveled down Dib's pale, almost naked body. The human only had a pair of boxers on. Zim smirked wider. Dib was weak… Practically putty in his hands…

Just where he wanted him.

He bent down and, just to tease the poor human, blew on the shell of his ear before whispering, "Horny yet?"

Dib whimpered, arching his back. Zim sniggered again, his smirk so wide it almost didn't fit his face at this point.

"Ah, ah, ah… Eagerness will only get you farther from your goal." Zim warned, straightening. He turned up the hormones in the human via the remote in his hand. Dib's eyes glazed over even more and his raging boner seemed impossibly harder. Zim hummed, then checked Dib's mental image monitor. The alien smirked.

Currently, playing in Dib's brain, were images of the human getting fucked up the ass by Zim.

Zim's smirk faded. Most of the images and short 'clips' of the fucking were kinky and lust-relieving only. But occasionally some clips would be slow and romantic, where they would be whispering each other's names, deeply in love, against any all odds…

The alien glanced back at Dib. Even in one of the worst moments of heat he'd ever been in, he was still madly in love with Zim, hoping that one day they could be…

_Together._

"I have to go run some tests." Zim coughed, pulling up his uniform's hood to hide the purple flush of being so…_flattered_ from the human. He turned off the hormone transducer and walked away quickly.

Dib laid there on the table, blushing redder than a tomato. He… Zim… But…

He shook his head. _I swear to God, this better be a fucked up dream…_

**FF**

When Dib found himself in the lab again the next morning, he was ticked.

When Zim didn't come in for about two hours, and only came in to check in on him, he was pissed.

When he didn't get to eat anything until Gir came running in and dropped a muffin in his mouth, he was a little less than fuming.

When his nose started itching, he was enraged.

So he snapped.

"ZIM!" He roared. "GET IN HERE!"

The alien was suddenly hovering above the human's face. "What's up?"

"Do I _really_ have to be chained to a table?" Dib huffed.

Zim seemed to be thinking. He made a humming noise, then nodded to himself, his eyes distant. "I suppose not. But I will give you a collar. If you try to leave, you won't make it past the front door."

"I can live with that." Dib said. "Just get me off this table."

"Fine." Zim walked off and came back quickly with a metal collar in his hand. He locked it around Dib's neck, then undid the chains.

Dib hopped up and immediately did some moderate stretches. By the cracks and cricks his bones made, he'd be hurting the next day. "What time is it?" He asked casually.

"About noon." Zim replied. Suddenly, Dib's vision was blocked. He took the item off his face and found that he was holding a black shirt. At his feet were a pair of skinny jeans and Converse shoes. It was some clothes from his house. "I took some stuff from your room. To make this place seem like home."

Dib laughed bitterly, putting on the jeans. "I never had a home. I would have run away as soon as eat fried chicken on the couch."

Zim sighed, shaking his head. "Anyway. I'll try to set up a room or something. Until then, you can crash on the couch."

"What's for lunch?" Dib asked, running up the stairs to the kitchen. Zim sighed again and followed at a slower pace.

"I don't usually eat unless Gir forces me… But I suppose I could go out and get some food." He said, arriving in the kitchen. Dib was poking in everywhere, looking as if he actually lived here. "You realize you're my pet now, right?" Zim asked. "Just to clarify."

Dib looked up at him, then grinned. "Yeah. I know. Now get me food. Pwease."

Zim put on his disguise and walked to the door. He paused and turned back to Dib, who was now poking Gir. "I hate you, just wanna get that out there."

Dib smiled at him. "Hate you, too…" Zim turned, but could vaguely hear a single word whispered that made a shiver of power go down his spine. "…Master…"

Now he understood why people liked animals.

**Mwahahahaha. Not what you expected from this story, huh? Well, it's not what I expected either. I just kinda wrote it. But I like this idea. Don't you?**

**Dib: …There was a week where we actually did that.**

**What? You be his house pet?**

**Dib: Yeah.**

**Zim: I had fun.**

**I bet you did. Anyway! I'm out! Rate, review, love!**


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